making up syllables: named, literally, for its peppermint patties

were you guys mega stoked about those church pictures in the last post? have you been thinking to yourself, "man, ya know what would make this blog even better? more religious-themed photography!" well guess what theistic blog fans! this shit is about to go off-the-wall non-secular.

when researching this trip i did many a google search with queries such as "3 week england itinerary" or "top places to see in the uk." and one thing almost all of them had in common was the unabashed york fan. and never was it like, "oh yeah and if you're up that way you should see york." it was, "quit whatever it is you're doing and get your ass to york." so i felt like i was on the fast track to good times when i booked three nights at a hostel in the heart of the york city walls.

look, it's not that york isn't nice, because there are a lot of really appealing good things about it. but you can probably get through all those nice, appealing things in one day if you really tried. two if you wanted to stretch it. but by day three you're just going to be wandering the streets like a zombie. that's even fitting in all of the quality museums they have (like, the quilt museum for example). you know who probably loves york? bill bryson. that dude loves getting caught up in the minutiae of boring museums. and it often lends his writing an air of authority because he bothered to read the plaque under every single feature and can now pass that info onto his readers. who else actually does that? but i digress...

york was once a real contender for top city in all of britania but then some young upstart by the name of london came and put them in their place. this was probably back when people owned serfs and most of the population couldn't read, so...having a four letter capital city might not have been a bad thing. point is york's heydey was back in the dark ages and from what i can tell not too much has changed since, and that has both its positives and negatives.

so let's start with the positives (because i already sort of did the negatives). well for one, the heart of the city is surrounded by a stone wall that is built on the foundations of a roman wall that was eventually built over by a norman wall that was eventually built over by a medieval wall that was eventually declared a national treasure and given stairs and a walk way. this means you can walk the entire length of the walls, almost 3 miles our tour guide told us, which is a fun way to see the city. also creepily voyeuristic because often you are just looking into the backs and windows of peoples' homes. which, who am i kidding, that's also why its fun. york is also home to york minster, one of the most famous church type buildings (is a minster a church? yes, according to the google search i just did) in the world. and no joke, its impressive. particularly the interior. pictures below but fair warning: it was dark and i needed a tripod. most of those were on like 1 to 2 second exposures with me just holding my breath and trying to stand still. so yeah, church and walls...old streets...history...these are the things york has going for it.

included in things in york that may work in its favor depending on who the visitor is (obviously not me) are fun interactive museums for children and douchey nightclubs for douches. i did not go to the aforementioned quilt museum but its probably fun for old-timey country grandmothers. i did however go to the national transportation museum, the best train museum in england (and perhaps the world?!) and was bored out of my mind. but kids looked like they were having lots of it.

i will say that the hostel was really nice (the fort ★★★★). it was new, had nice facilities, private bathrooms with shower and toilet all in one unit (like in korea!), nice public spaces and a discount for the restaurant and bar downstairs. i will also say that the very first night i went out to take a piss and locked myself out. and though i knocked could not get back in. and had to sleep on a couch in the public area using a towel for a blanket and another for a pillow. but aside from that really just a lovely place.

oh, and by the way, york is known for its chocolate but has no real relation to the minty chocolate treat that shares its name. file that one under negative. so york, another beautiful town that just left me feeling neutral. luckily, edinburgh is next and what an amazing place that turned out to be.